You'll learn in this article:
- How to get out of the friendzone by becoming a more interesting person (my tips)
- The power of the come back to re-ignite the tension.
- Sami's transformation guide to become a new you.
The most nasty place, where many men have no clue how to get out
We have all fallen into this category and it’s a nasty, painful place to be in. The friend zone has taken many guys who are still attracted to the girl who friendzoned them yet now have no chance to ever get out.
Or so it seems…
What is the friend zone?
The friend zone is when you are attracted to a girl and after not taking action fast enough, she has categorized you as “just a friend”. You no longer have the new guy appeal, or the future boyfriend potential, or even the one night stand opportunity. She has decided, categorized, labelled and put you on the shelf of the friend zone and there you will stay.
Who’s fault is it that you got in the friend zone?
You may not have realized it because you were just trying to be nice, but it’s your fault. By not being authentic with your feelings, by keeping them hidden, by ‘being a nice guy until she likes me’ you’ve shot yourself in the foot and now you’re here.
You aren’t the first and you aren’t the last guy this will happen to.
The good news is I’m here to help you get out of it, but also learn never to fall in again.
So, lets just say you are currently in the friend zone and still want a chance to hook up with this girl, what are the steps?
Disappear for a while
If I see you every day, and you lose 20 pounds over a 3 month period, I won’t really notice the significant change. I’ll know you lost a bit of weight but I won’t see it as clearly.
If I don’t see you for 3 months, and you lose 20 pounds, I’ll be shocked! I’ll be so impressed I’ll congratulate you on your hard work and progress and hi 5 the shit out of you.
If you are in constant contact with this girl, she won’t notice your progress, she won’t notice the change in you and she won’t be as impressed. For her to see the change we are going to work on, you need to disappear for a while. Stop being available, make some distance between you and her, don’t hang out for a while. This is important for your ‘come back’.
Work on yourself
Pulling a Houdini and showing up again the same isn’t that impressive. For her to be really captivated and want to give you another chance, you’ll need to be a ‘new you’. This is easier said than done but here’s what I suggest:
- Work on your fitness & health
- Work on your social circle
- Meet new girls
- Work on your business
- Practise your hobbies.
The most attractive thing you can do is work on yourself to come back a brand new well-established person. Working on things like your fitness, your future goals, meeting new girls, taking more time to invest in your hobbies are all building you up into a new and improved version of you. It shows you aren’t so focused on one girl, you actually have a life, and in that life you have new friends and girls around you.
The come back
When you do eventually return (a few months later) you’ll want to contact her to catch up. This should be just you two, it’s better to not have it as a group meeting.
Take her on a fun packed adventure date. This could be a theme park, a walk in an average park while you guys exchange exciting stories, ice-skating, or even a night out for drinks. As long as she gets to experience some fun emotions with the new you so that she can see she was wrong about the label she chose for you.
At the height of the emotions and the stories and the laughs and smiles, you should test the waters and get closer to her to see how she reacts. If you feel like it’s a good call, go in for the kiss. (See my article about how to go for the kiss here).
DO NOT boast about what you’ve been doing, if she asks, then you can fill her in, but you don’t want to sit there and just spend hours talking about you you you.
The best way to never fall into the friend zone again
Take action faster. Stop waiting for the perfect moment, stop being so nice in hopes she’ll like you, stop being her friend first and boyfriend later. Just take action. If you do, you won’t even have to go through the entire process above
There you have it, how to successfully get out of the friendzone and move things forward sexually and also how to never fall into it again!
Best of luck,